Wake Up and Dawn Gently Breaking

The end of the year is fast approaching closely followed by the dawning of the new year with all of its potential challenges, triumphs, joys and friendships. 

This morning I was reflecting a bit on this past year and the coming year and I came across these poems that I had written back in June.  I thought it would be appropriate to share them here.  They came to me following an early morning process, one of those rare times when I allow my soul to respond without resistance to a sleep state/dream state trigger no matter what the time of day or night. 

This is the gift that God gives me when I allow Love to prevail in my life.

Wake Up

Wake up, wake up

The day softly calls

New adventures to be had

Old memories to recall

God’s Love to discover

As He reshapes my soul.

Wake up, wake up

Come out and see

As God calls softly to me

To experience His Majesty

To soak in the warmth

Of His Divine Love

Flowing into my heart

from Heaven above

Dawn gently breaking

A soft glow is growing

As the darkness in my soul

With God’s Love is transforming

Into a gently glowing light for all the world to see

The power that God’s Love

Has over me

Reshaping my soul and making me whole

Slowly the light grows

As the sun peaks over the horizon

Slowly the day brightens and suddenly I see

That God transforms my soul

Just as He does each new day

Softly, slowly, gently

So as not to alarm

But rather to warm and to calm

Wake up, wake up

The day softly calls

New adventures to be had

Old memories to recall

God’s Love to discover

As He reshapes my soul.

03.06.11

Dawn gently breaking

Dawn gently breaking

A soft glow is growing

As the darkness of night

Gives way to a new day awakening.

The twinkling lights of the city

Fade in the distance

As the warm glowing sky

Offers no resistance

To the newness of the day

Beckoning me forth to go out and play

A kookaburra calls gladly

His laughter is catching

‘come play with me’ he calls

A chorus of song responding

As God’s creatures let me know

That a new day is beckoning

The warmth of the sunshine

Washers over a new day

Beckoning me to come out and play

To uncover the secrets of this unique day

And join in the chorus of praise

For all of God’s abundant gifts

A day full of promise and hope

Full of laughter and tears

Full of surprises and fears

As I allow God’s Love

To wash away my resistance

And to reveal the real me that She created.

Dawn gently breaking

A soft glow is growing

As the darkness of night

Gives way to a new day awakening

03.06.11

Resistance and Change

The last couple of days I have been travelling, praying and feeling into some emotions that are coming up for me.  At the moment I am recognizing just how much resistance I have in me to unlocking the truth of the errors in my soul.  I am also recognizing that the desire that I thought I had for God and truth is really very small and I feel like a failure at the moment - like nothing I do will ever be good enough.  Yesterday on my way home from Uralla (having been to a talk at Kyabra the previous night) I stopped at Giroween National Park near Stanthorpe in Qld.  It was here as I sat and watched the water flowing over the huge granite boulders, some of which have worn away creating cracks and crevices in the river bed, that I received the following message.  I am sharing it here with the understanding that I do not consider myself to be a medium and am still very uncertain of the accuracy of these messages.  Please recognize that this, and any other such messages that I post here are received through the filters of my own errors and may not be 100% accurate.  I encourage you to feel into the messages and make your own assesments of the level of truth contained therein.

Received 15^th December at Giraween National Park. Qld

Have you ever considered how a free flowing stream will eventually wear away even the toughest rocks?  So it is with God’s Love. When you allow God’s Love to wash over you soul He will wear away the resistance of even the most hardened heart.

Allow God’s Love to continually wash over you.  Pray for His Love to enter your soul and eventually all of your resistances will crumble and wash away, just as the toughest granite will eventually wear down to mere grains of sand as the gentle stream washes over it, until it is completely broken down and the landscape is made anew.

God’s creation is all around you.  Observe it.  Learn from it.  For surely that which He does for the lowliest of His creations He will do for you, the greatest of His creation and even greater things.

Learn to bend and adapt just as nature does.

Do not offer resistance to change for change is an integral part of God’s landscape and that includes you and all of His children.

Learn to trust this for you will need to be able to rest in the certainty of this truth in the coming months and years.

With love

Margaret

On Trust and Judgement

This letter to God was written a couple of days after I recently began my journey into self-responsibility and God reliance.  I had been away from home less than a week and was already feeling the strength of my addictions.  I am very grateful for the advice given to me by my guides both then and today, for once again, as I type and re-read this, I realize that it is perfect for where I am at at this moment. I hope it is of help to you also.

love

Linda

04.11.11

Dear God,

I don’t want to do this anymore!  I don’t want to face the truth of how unloving I have been in my life!   I don’t want to know how much I hate men, how much anger I have within my soul about the way I have been treated by men in the past.  I don’t want to know how unloving I have been!  I don’t want to feel all the guilt and shame that I feel about how I have used John as a comfort blanket to make me feel better about myself.  I am afraid that if I let him go I will sink into the dark abyss of despair that is in my soul and I will not have the courage or the strength to find my way back to me!  I don’t even know who that is anymore God!  I am not sure that I ever knew.  

I feel lost, alone, confused and jaded in this whole process.  I don’t recognize when I am in my body or not.  I have trouble recognizing love.  I crave reassurance.  It is like a drug and without it I can not survive.  I need someone to tell me that I am ok, that I am lovable, that I am worthwhile. 

I want to run back home to John’s loving embrace, to the comfort and reassurance that I know he will give me.  But if I do that I will have failed.  It will be yet another quick fix to make me feel better and if I do that I will be placing a very unloving demand upon him.  I don’t want to do that anymore God!  I don’t want to live in a relationship full of addiction and avoidance.  I have caused him enough pain.  I have pushed him away enough. 

But I am lost God! I feel all of this turmoil in my soul and I don’t understand it.  I want someone to rescue me!  I feel that I cannot do this alone and I need help but I do not know where to turn.  I don’t feel my guides with me anymore God.  Why have I turned them away?  I feel so inadequate, so small, so broken, so false!  How do I heal this part of me God? Will I ever have the courage to face the truth? To let You in? To trust love?

Why don’t I want to trust love God? What is love? Who am I?  Where am I? Please help me!  Show me what to do!  Can I please ask for some help?  Can I please ask for some guidance and for the humility to take direction and the willingness to be open to the truth? 

How do I succumb to the grief around the truth without beating myself up about it?  How do I learn to be gentle and loving with myself?  How do I learn to trust the truth? How do I learn to forgive myself?

With God!

But where is God?  Why don’t I feel Her?

God is watching and waiting for you to open your heart and soul to Her.  She wants to comfort you but you keep putting up blocks.  You keep running away.

How do I stop running away?

Allow yourself to feel the fear and the pain without judgement or expectation.  Allow the emotion to flow. Allow the emotion to reveal the truth.  Do not judge it, do not try to pre-empt it, just allow it.

How do I let go of judgement?

Feel what it is like to feel judged.  Feel what your own judgement had done to others.  Just feel it, without question, without judgement, just acceptance.  And when it is done, when the emotion is spent, feel the relief.  Do not judge it, do not question it, just feel it.  Accept it. 

You are making this much harder than it needs to be.  Relax into the process more.  Trust the process.  Trust God.  Trust yourself and trust us.  We are always with you waiting for an opportunity to assist you and that comes through love.  Do not be so hard on yourself.  Trust and allow the process.  Love yourself even in your error for when you recognize and release the error another part of the real you is revealed, the real you who is beautiful, the real you who others sometimes see.  Trust this.  Love yourself and then you will find it much easier to love others. 

You don’t have to do it all in one go.  It takes time and patience.  Be patient with yourself.  You are all beginning on a remarkable journey, one that has not been followed on earth for nearly 2000 years and even then was only done successfully by one man.  He guides you now.  Listen to him, learn from him, trust him, but mostly be patient with yourself.  This is not a race.  It is not a competition but rather an opportunity that you have chosen to accept.  Do not worry about time, you are too caught up in time.  Time is an illusion and it can be a trap.  Live each moment as it presents yourself.  Do not skip over moments, this is an error in you that will take much practice to overcome.  Learn to be present in every moment, every aspect of every moment.  Meditate more and in the stillness notice everything without judgement. Learn to be present and go from there.  There are no shortcuts but you can prolong your journey through arrogance, impatience and judgement. 

Learn to be humble, to be present. 

We will help you.

 We love you very much.

Peter and others

A Letter from God

I have been away for the past 18days camping on my own.  This was for me an exercise in stepping more fully into self-responsibility and God-reliance and challenging the huge addiction that I had to being rescued. It was an interesting experience and brough up much stuff for me, both exposing some of the errors in my soul and rekindling an amazement and wonder at all of God's creation.  Over the next few days or weeks I will post more of what I learn't on this trip but today I would like to share some things I learn on the trip and also an exercise I did with the Prayer for Divine Love while away (Thanks to Anna for suggesting this exercise).  I suggest that you do the same, use the Prayer as a guide to write a letter to you from God.

Things I learnt from 18 days camping on my own

With God anything is possible

I can survive on my own if I have to

I CAN trust God

When I stay connected to my body though physical activity/exercise I connect to my real (emotional) self (soul) and my guides more easily

I am never alone even if sometimes I feel lonely

ALL of God’s creation is truly amazing (I knew this but good to have it reaffirmed)

It is OK to lean on somebody for support, especially if that someone is God

It is OK to be gentle with myself, God doesn’t expect me to be perfect in an instant, He is infinitely patient and I am allowed to be patient with myself too.  Eternity is a VERY long time.

When I hold on to anger/fear/rage I am more likely to be attacked by annoying insects but when I release fear/anger/rage lovingly insects are kinder to me.

Truth when coupled with love is a gift

My body works best on a predominately raw diet.

A letter from God

My dearest child, I am your Father who loves you and through this love I have created all that is for your enjoyment and contemplation.  You are My child, the greatest of all of My creations and My Love for you knows no bounds.  My soul sings with joy at your triumphs and I am delighted when you turn to Me in your anguish.

My child, how I wish you could understand how great My Love is for you and how much I desire for you to grow in love and become at-one with Me, free of error and ever-growing in love and truth, respecting all of My creation and understanding the intricacies of its purpose.

I long for you to understand that My Love is waiting for you and that you simply have to open your soul to Truth so that the errors might leave you and My Holy Spirit may then fill your soul with My Love in such great abundance that your soul will be truly transformed into the very essence of Myself.  And with each step of this transformation your faith will continue to grow until you realize that you are My child, filled with love and compassion for yourself and for each and every one of your brothers and sisters and all of My creation.

I want you to understand that I am your Father and you are My child and that My Love for you is such that I will give to you everything that you need for a life filled with love and bliss. But you need to want these things from Me with all sincerity and know that I can not and will not provide these gifts unless you choose to receive them through truth and love.

Please know dear child that I am here always and I wait for you to awaken your desire for Me and to come to Me in earnestness and with faith that I will provide for you everything that you need.

I watch over you every moment of every day and you are always in My Heart, even when you stray and forget that I am there, yet still I am with you.  I have sent you angels to guide you, but you must learn to listen to them with your heart and soul and they will help to keep you safe from those who may choose to try to harm or control you and try to steer you away from Me through the temptations of the flesh which will weaken you.

My love knows no bounds and as your beloved Father I want to bestow My Love upon you in great abundance.  Know that I wait for you and I long to take you fully into My loving arms where you may rest your weary soul.

You are safe with Me and can trust in My Love.

Come my child, come home to where love and joy and bliss await you for I am your Father and I wait for you. My soul is bursting with love for you.  Come home to Me and rest where you belong.

Your loving Father.

14.11.11

Sitting on the Sidelines of Death

I have been away for a couple of weeks and during that time I had the privilage of nursing my dying aunt at her home along with several other members of my family.  Being awake during the early hours of the morning or the darkest part of the night gave me pleanty of time for reflection and prayer, often times I would pray with my aunt or read to her passages on love and faith from the Judas messages.  It was a very special time for all involved in her care at home.  For the first time in my life I felt a sense of peace over what was to come, for the first time I did not feel a growing dread or fear of what lies ahead.  For the most part I felt at peace knowing that God's grand designs are totally loving, knowing that I would have the opportunity to speak with her again one day.  In the early hours of one morning as I sat by her bedside not knowing how much longer she would be with us I wrote the following passage.  I share it now with you in the hope that it might help you or a loved one should you find yourself in a similar situation.

with love

Linda

29.10.2011

Sitting on the Sidelines of Death

I am sitting on the sidelines of death watching a loved one struggle to let go.  Watching and waiting silently in the early hours of the morning wondering how long she will hold on, how long fear will take hold?  For now she seems peaceful, resting comfortably, breathing slowly, heavily.  She is far too young to be leaving us this way, just sixty seven years here on earth, but her body is giving way as the cancer takes hold.  She has had a good life filled with adventure and love but it has been marred by sadness and struggle, by fear and doubt and they have taken their toll and so it is time for her to let go and face the truth.

I observe those around her, each with their own personal struggle, not really understanding this process we call death and too afraid to investigate what it really means.  And I see myself in them not so very long ago, afraid, doubtful, confused, avoiding the truth of what is for fear of what it might stir in my soul.  But now I am just grateful for the knowledge I have and the peace it brings to my soul.  Grateful for God’s Divine Love and knowing that this life we experience here on earth is just the beginning, and when our physical body fades we simply transition to a new place, a new way of being where there is no escaping truth and where love is our only salvation. Grateful for the gifts I have been given and the love I have been shown.

I watch silently as she sleeps, listening to her breathing and the sounds of the constant traffic one block away.  Soon the day will begin to awaken bringing with it fresh hope of a few more precious hours with our loved one and a constant stream of fresh faces coming to pay their respects and say their final farewells.

It is a funny thing this process we call death, it has so many varied connotations for each individual that it touches, but for most the dominant emotion appears to be fear.  I see it in their eyes, in the way they carry themselves and in the way they valiantly attempt to pretend that everything is all right.  I feel this fear in their souls, pushed far into the recesses of their minds, buried beneath an external veneer of strength and solidarity.   They do not realize the damage this fear is doing to their bodies but sooner or later this fear will surface in their physical bodies begging to be recognized, experienced and released.  This is a difficult process as I have found, but as I now allow myself to begin to experience and release my long held fears I notice a freeing of my body and a growing peace in my soul.

And so I sit on the sidelines of death observing its progress and the effects it has on those around our loved one whose last days and moments we are witnessing and I am grateful for the knowledge and experience I have of God’s Divine Love and the peace it brings to my soul at this time of transition.

She sleeps peacefully as loved ones keep watch silently by her side not knowing how much longer she has with us.  The dark lonely hours of the night give way to the soft glow of dawn, to the first soft songs of the early birds gradually intensifying as they are joined by others until their chorus can’t be ignored and the sky grows even lighter with each passing minute.  Soon the sun will peak its head over the range warming us with its rays and the slow soft drone of night turns into the business of the day.

She drifts in and out of sleep now brightening the room with her smile and sense of humour.  How much longer will she stay we do not know, we know only that we do not want to let her go for we will miss her when she is gone, her sense of mischief and fun, her laughter and her love.  It has been a privilege to know her, to call her sister, aunt, friend, but let her go we must for her time is near, a time of sadness for all who hold her dear and do not yet fully trust in God’s grand designs.

Rest well dear one for a new adventure will soon begin. 

Rest well knowing you are not alone, your angels are waiting to bring you home.

Confusion

It has been some time now since I have written anything, either here or in my notebook. I am struggling with desire and with worthiness to have/follow my desires. Lots has been happening for us and I have been away quite a lot which is taking me away from my desire to write more. I question if this is a pure desire of just another means by which to be noticed? I have been feeling totally overwhelmed by the barrage of emotions that have been cropping up and by the lack of time to process these. I know this is an illusion though for if I was being truly humble I would allow myself to fully feel these emotions as they arise. I find I still have a lot of shame, fear, doubt and mistrust in me. I am working on these, especially fear and I am noticing that as I feel my fear and allow it to pass through me, my body feels freer but still I find it daunting and I often find myself questioning God. This poem was written some time ago but I find it is still as relevant now as it was when I wrote it. I pray for the courage and the willingness to go deeply into my fear, shame and grief so that my body and soul may feel the healing power of God's Great Love

Confusion
Confusion coursing through my soul
Dark clouds descending
Struggling to understand the truth
That I have been avoiding

And I find myself doubting
God’s Love for me.

Confusion swirling all around me
Engulfing my soul
Seeping into the very depths of my being
Allowing doubt to take hold.

Finding it difficult to breathe
Guilt and shame descending
Struggling to understand
God’s plan for me

Confusion rising within me once more
Keeping me away from God’s door.

Constantly dipping in and out
Afraid to know the truth
Running away
Hiding
Confused

Confusion coursing through my soul
Distracting me from the truth
Where is God when I need Her?
Am I not worthy of Her love
Why does She abandon me
in my hour of need?

Feeling weak and helpless
Doubting God’s great plan
Feeling weak
Fragile
Unworthy of God’s love

Confusion swirling all around me
Too afraid to understand
Wanting to run away and hide
Confusion engulfing me
Will fear and doubt survive?

Praying for guidance
As tears stream down my face
Help me to have the courage
To face the truth.
Forgive me for my weakness.

Confusion coursing through my soul
Feeling abandoned and unloved
Too afraid to face the truth
Cowering
Hiding
Avoiding

Help me please to face the truth
Give me courage
Give me faith
Teach me humility
Remove the veil of confusion
So that I may come to face reality

Confusion coursing through my soul
Confusion swirling all around me
Confusion…
Confused….
Afraid….

Confusion coursing through my soul
Confusion swirling all around me
Fear…
Doubt…
Confused…confused…confused.

I am so weak
Choosing pain over truth
Why do I torture myself so
Why won’t I let fear go?

Is the truth so painful
That I would choose
To torment and torture myself
Rather than face the truth?

Is love so distant
that it is unreachable?
Or is it simply
that I am not capable?

Open my heart and my soul I pray
That I may have the courage
to face another day
Open my heart and my soul I pray
So that Your Love
Might find a place to stay.

Linda
08.03.11

Where are You Father?

It has been a few weeks since I posted anything new, this is mostly because I have been resisting a lot of emotions and struggling with fear. I had lost sight of God as the central focus in my life and I paid dearly for this. I continued to pray to God for guidance and for the courage and the willingness to face the truth. Today my prayers were answered and I share now with you the struggles that I have been facing. It took several hours to write this letter to God as I worked my way through the emotins that came up while writing, finally, after a couple of hours a picture emerged and I was able to gain some clarity around the emotion. I hope this is of some benefit to you.

.......................................................................

06.07.11

Where are You Father? Are You here? Lately I have been struggling to feel Your presence in my life and I do not understand why I have shut You out so! Father, I know form experience that my life flows much more smoothly when You remain at the centre of my thoughts, so why have I abandoned You? Why have I allowed myself to get so caught up in day to day events? Because of this I now find myself struggling with many aspects of my life and I don’t understand it! What causes me to turn away from You? How can I open my soul to the truth of these emotions Father so that I may release these errors that me from connecting more fully with You?

I pray often Father, but my prayers go unheard and unanswered – why? What is the error in my soul that needs to be released right now in order for me to allow Your love back into my life? How can I do this Father? Dare I ask who will help me? Or perhaps You want me to know that only I can reach into the dark recesses of my soul to release the pain hidden there. But I have tried Father, I have tried and it seems that I am weak and cowardly and don’t yet want to go there fully. Can You please help me to have the courage and the willingness to face this truth which is preventing me from having a deeper connection with You? Please!

I seem to be so overrun with doubt and fear at the moment Father and I am struggling to understand why this is so. It is difficult what You ask of me Father, to be in this world but not of this world, it is difficult to be truly open and humble in the midst of people who are so driven by fear and avoidance and I recognize myself in them Father. I recognize my own cowardice and avoidance and I feel such deep shame at this for I know it means that I do not yet trust You fully! Please help me to overcome this fear that I have, lift this burden of shame form my soul so that I may come to know You more fully, so that I may have the courage to serve You more completely, so that I may learn to be a beacon of light and love and hope in a world filled with darkness, fear and confusion.

I still struggle to understand why me Father! Why is it that I am amongst the few who are as yet open to learning Your truths and have the privilege of learning directly from Yeshua and Mary? How is that possible Father when I feel so small and insignificant, so incomplete and broken! What could I possibly have to offer that someone else doesn’t already have? What is special about me? How can I best serve You Father as well as my brothers and sisters? What is the gift that You have given me that will enable me to serve You most completely? Can You please help me to overcome the blocks that I have to uncovering this gift, the fear of ridicule and rejection that is still so deeply imbedded in my soul?

Why do I feel so helpless and useless Father? Will I ever find the courage to face the truth of this injury in my soul? Only You can help me Father, only You! Please help me to find the courage and the willingness to face the darkness in my soul and to step out from the shadows and into the glory of Your Light and Love! It feels safe here in my darkness. Here in the shadows I can pretend that everything is alright, I can pretend that I am not broken lying discarded on a pile of rocks, numb to my pain and discomfort. But if I step into the light Father I will have to face the truth of my injured self, I will have to see myself as I really am, as You seem me and that feels terrifying! But I am beginning to recognize these rocks that I am laying on Father and they are uncomfortable, at times painful and I realize that my only chance of freedom is to find the courage to step into the light and face the truth of my bruised and battered soul.

Will You hold my hand Father as I step gingerly into the light? Will You help me find the courage to face the truth and release my fear, my pain, my shame? Do I have the courage to face the ugliness, the distortions and KNOW that You love me anyway, that You know who I truly am and that that child is perfect? Can I allow myself to feel the truth in this, to KNOW that You created me to be a unique and beautiful soul full of potential and passion? Dare I hope that this is True? This seems so unlikely Father, so far removed from my experiences that it is difficult to grasp – that You see my errors, my distortions, my ugliness and You love me anyway because You see beyond my wounds to the perfect child that You created, to the boundless potential that You inspired in my soul! To me this is as yet incomprehensible and yet somewhere deep within my soul something is stirring, an inkling that perhaps this IS the truth, that You created me a perfect, unblemished child full of passion and potential. An inkling is stirring in my soul Mother, a longing to know the truth of who You created me to be, to know who I am. Who am I? Who am I? Who is this child who was created perfect in natural love and how did she become the broken, confused and frightened child she is now? How can I free my soul of these chains that bind and restrict me? How can I learn to love, to let my spirit soar? How can I uncover my passions and live up to my potential?

Only You can help me Father, only You can break apart these chains that bind me and free my soul of its errors. Help me to have the courage to step out of the darkness and into the light of Your Love!

Linda
06.07.11

..........................................................................
Then this followed

How can I thank You for Your love

How can I thank You for Your love
Your patience
Your kindness
Your mercy?
What do I have to offer that could possibly express to You
My gratitude, my deep appreciation for all that You have given me?

You patiently watch over me and wait for me to understand
To realize that it is I who hold the key to my own salvation,
That You are always there waiting for me to recognize my errors,
My weaknesses and to surrender to the grief and pain
That has gripped my soul for so many years,
Holding tight, binding me, restricting me,
Preventing me from becoming all that You intended me to be.

Bit by bit I can feel the chains break away.
Bit by bit my soul regains its freedom.
A freedom lost in childhood, clouded over by fear and pain,
Muddied by doubt and confusion.
But as I allow myself to surrender to this pain
As I find the courage to face the fears and doubts
Your love begins to wash me clean
Revealing a hidden beauty full of passion and potential.
How can I thank You for Your Love,
Your patience,
Your kindness,
Your mercy?

I give to You all that I am in this moment,
Still broken, still unsure but beginning to understand,
Learning to love and to trust.
I give to You all that I may become,
My hopes and dreams of one day becoming whole again
Of one day seeing You face to face
Whole, restored to the perfect child that You created me to be
And even greater than that knowing that Your Love fills my soul
And overflows to all that I encounter.

I give You all that I am and all that I am ever capable of becoming
For it is Your Love that sets me free
Your Love that reveals the hidden me.
Thank You for Your Love,
Your patience,
Your kindness,
Your mercy.
Thank You for loving Me!

Linda
06.07.11